Thistle

As a parent, the things you will do for your children makes for a very long list.

It begins with the whole letting another human being take up residence is what was once a firm taut belly and ends somewhere around...well, it doesn't ever truly end.

I've wiped heinous poop explosions off of many surfaces (including the wall, my shirt and underneath my fingernails). I've caught puke in my bare hands. And I even had to put a fever-reducing suppository into my wee baby's butt.

But there is one thing I cannot bear (aside from watching Dora): loose teeth.

Mina is at an age where she is losing them faster than a meth addict on a bender.

The squick factor is high, not helped by the fact that she wants me to actually wiggle the hanging on by a thread fuckers myself.

Excuse me. I had to stop to retch for a moment.

The only saving grace of the whole experiment is that she looks even cuter with missing teeth. More like a goofy little imp than a hillbilly.

Her adult teeth are starting to come in around the remaining baby teeth and I can already tell that she is going to have my teeth.

Mine may look fine now, but as a kid I had truly awful teeth. The first time I got braces put on was in third grade if that tells you anything.

At least she doesn't have the horrid overbite I did. I'll go ahead and thank Jim's bucky-balancing genes for that.

Jim is out of town, so I need to figure out how to get something from the tooth fairy on the DL. Our tooth fairy has brought small gifts for each tooth so far. Might be time for her to start making with the cash money.

A few weeks ago, while visiting the inlaws for Father's Day, my father-in-law mentioned that they would be happy to help with the cost of braces for the girls when the time came.

Small miracles, people. Small miracles.