Sunday, January 4, 2009

And not a single bra in my freezer

Mina hosted her first slumber party last night.

They had fun. I survived.

I took some adorable pictures, but I feel weird posting photos of other people's kids without their permission. Getting their permission would mean letting them read this blog. Letting them read this blog would mean my kid probably wouldn't be invited to any more play dates.

So, no so cute your face will fall off pictures. Sorry.

The two girls Mina invited over arrived promptly at 5pm and immediately made a mad dash for Mina's room to play. Santa brought Mina a kiddie makeup set for Christmas, so they made short work of that right away.

I told Santa I wasn't really down with first graders wearing makeup, but he told me to loosen up a bit. It's only for fun. No one's entering Mina into a beauty contest. No harm. No foul.

Jim had a thing in Chicago so I suggested he take Audrey to my parent's house to avoid any bickering between her and her sister. They get along for the most part, but I know that when one has their friends over, all bets are off. Mina got to have her little party without competing for attention and Audrey got Grandma and Papa all to herself. Everybody wins!

My friend Lauren came over for the first part of the night. She's the art teacher at one of the local elementary schools. It was nice to not only have another adult there to hang with, but an adult who is used to dealing with kids in groups.

I know how to deal with my own kids. They know I do not take whining or bullshit or general dumbfuckery lightly. When you add two other kids I'm not raising into the mix, I'm always afraid of permanently scarring someone.

I fed them dinner, fed them brownies, let them loose on some pre-prepared craft supplies and gave them full reign on pretty much whatever they wanted to do.

This when I realized that having an odd number at a slumber party isn't such a hot idea.

They have such different personalities that it was inevitable that someone was getting left out.

Mina can get along with pretty much anyone, but I could tell she was being pulled back and forth between her two guests.

One is quiet and thoughtful. She would rather sit and color and do crafty stuff and chat. Mina is all about making art. They get along famously.

The other girl is loud and likes to do a million things at once. Mina is all about being loud and raucous. They get along famously.

It's the dynamic between the two guests that didn't go so well.

The loud girl kept snarking at the quiet girl. Not cool.

The loud girl kept trying to tell Mina secrets while leaving the quiet girl out of it. Double not cool.

I could see Mina trying to please both of them, to keep both of them happy and it was killing me not to tell the loud girl to cut the bullshit.

I tried to stay close enough to ward off hurt feelings, but I also thought they needed to work some stuff out on their own.

It got to be 9:30 and I was dropping big ol' hints that they needed to start thinking about going to bed.

Mina usually goes to be at 7:30, even on the weekends. She's 7 years old. She needs her sleep, period.

I finally got them to lay down at 10 pm.

I think I was asleep by 10:05.


Scope said...

As I understand from my sister, it only gets worse. But you handled this one well.

!!WARNING!! - PARENTING ADVICE FROM BACHELOR - Despite not wanting to sound like my mother, the phrase, "In this house we don't..." is one I often use on visiting children that I know. "In this house, we don't whisper secrets." etc. The future Secretary of State TOLD us that it takes a village to raise a child, so it could be viewed as our civic and patriotic duty to correct (scar) other people's children. Just like adults did when we were kids. (For children I don't know out in public, I personally prefer catching the child's eye and hitting them with the menacing glare and then rolling my eyes back in my head. Don't care if mom sees it or not.)

My name is Ray, Ray O'Sunshine.

Earth Muffin said...

You are a brave, brave woman. We've done a multiple kid playdate, but I still have a one-kid-sleepover limit. I hope you have a nice, relaxing day day today!

bubbles said...

I have two girls - older, though. Nice call on sending one off to Grandma!!

I'm still not used to mean girls. My kids have figured out how much tolerance I have for behavior outside of standards - none. Funny how they can just *feel* that what a guest is doing is not within the code! They usually handle it on their own, pronto. Then the mention it later in the debrief.

You sound like you have a similar view of dealing with other people's kids. I prefer not because they almost always disappoint me!

(Not that I'm a tyrant, or anything. I just think that there are rules about treating others in life that good humans follow...)

Anonymous said...

I would have had quiet girl help me dip loud girl's hand in water while she slept.

Tanya Espanya said...

ohmygod, do boys have sleepovers? I won't have to worry about this, will I?

I like how you handled it, and I like the other comments, too.

Bachelor Scope is right on the money with the "In this house...". It's a good way to tell someone they're being a dummy without hurting their feelings.

Alice said...

I am glad I have a few more years before I have to deal with this. I would have bitchslapped the load girl and told her to shut up.... not so great

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